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说梦

作者:朱自清 文章来源:会员整理

伪《列(lie)子》里有(you)一段梦(meng)话,说得(de)甚(shen)好:

周之(zhi)尹氏大治产,其下趣(qu)役(yi)者,侵(qin)晨(chen)昏(hun)(hun)而(er)不息。有老(lao)役(yi)夫筋力竭(jie)矣(yi),而(er)使之(zhi)弥勤。昼则(ze)呻呼而(er)即事,夜(ye)则(ze)昏(hun)(hun)惫而(er)熟寐。精神荒散,昔昔梦为(wei)国君:居人民之(zhi)上,总一国之(zhi)事;游燕宫观,恣意所欲,其乐无比。觉则(ze)复役(yi)人。......尹氏心营(ying)世事,虑(lv)钟(zhong)家业,心形俱(ju)疲,夜(ye)亦昏(hun)(hun)惫而(er)寐。昔昔梦为(wei)人仆:趋(qu)走作役(yi),无不为(wei)也;

数骂杖挞,无不(bu)至(zhi)也。眠中啽呓呻呼,彻(che)旦息焉。......

此文原意是(shi)(shi)(shi)(shi)要(yao)说出苦(ku)逸(yi)之(zhi)(zhi)复,数之(zhi)(zhi)常(chang)也;若(ruo)(ruo)欲觉梦兼(jian)之(zhi)(zhi),岂可得(de)邪?这(zhei)其间大有(you)玄味,我(wo)是(shi)(shi)(shi)(shi)领略不着(zhe)(zhe)的(de);我(wo)只是(shi)(shi)(shi)(shi)断章取义地(di)赏识这(zhei)件(jian)(jian)故事(shi)的(de)自身(shen),所(suo)(suo)以(yi)才老远地(di)引了来。我(wo)只觉得(de)梦不是(shi)(shi)(shi)(shi)一件(jian)(jian)坏东西。即真(zhen)如这(zhei)件(jian)(jian)故事(shi)所(suo)(suo)说,也还是(shi)(shi)(shi)(shi)很有(you)意思的(de)。因为人生有(you)限,我(wo)们若(ruo)(ruo)能夜(ye)夜(ye)有(you)这(zhei)样清(qing)楚的(de)梦,则过(guo)了一日,足抵两日,过(guo)了五十岁(sui)(sui),足抵一百岁(sui)(sui);如此便宜的(de)事(shi),真(zhen)是(shi)(shi)(shi)(shi)落(luo)得(de)的(de)。至(zhi)于梦中的(de)苦(ku)乐(le),则照我(wo)素人的(de)见解,毕竟是(shi)(shi)(shi)(shi)梦中的(de)苦(ku)乐(le),不必斤斤计较的(de)。若(ruo)(ruo)必欲斤斤计较,我(wo)要(yao)大胆地(di)说一句:他(ta)和那些在墙上贴(tie)红纸条(tiao)儿,写着(zhe)(zhe)夜(ye)梦不祥,书破大吉(ji)的(de),同样地(di)不懂得(de)梦!

但庄子(zi)说(shuo)道(dao)(dao),至(zhi)(zhi)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)无梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)。伪《列(lie)子(zi)》里也说(shuo)道(dao)(dao),古之(zhi)真(zhen)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren),其觉自(zi)忘,其寝不(bu)(bu)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)。--张湛注(zhu)曰,真(zhen)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)无往不(bu)(bu)忘,乃(nai)(nai)当不(bu)(bu)眠,何(he)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)之(zhi)有(you)?可(ke)知我(wo)(wo)们(men)这(zhei)几(ji)位(wei)(wei)先哲不(bu)(bu)甚以做(zuo)(zuo)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)为(wei)然(ran),至(zhi)(zhi)少也总以为(wei)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)是(shi)不(bu)(bu)大高明的(de)东西。但孔(kong)子(zi)就与他(ta)(ta)(ta)们(men)不(bu)(bu)同,他(ta)(ta)(ta)深(shen)以不(bu)(bu)复梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)见周(zhou)公为(wei)憾;他(ta)(ta)(ta)自(zi)然(ran)是(shi)爱做(zuo)(zuo)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)的(de),至(zhi)(zhi)少也是(shi)不(bu)(bu)反(fan)对做(zuo)(zuo)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)的(de)。--殆所(suo)谓(wei)(wei)时(shi)乎做(zuo)(zuo)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)则做(zuo)(zuo)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)者欤?我(wo)(wo)觉得(de)至(zhi)(zhi)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren),真(zhen)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren),毕(bi)竟没有(you)我(wo)(wo)们(men)的(de)份儿(er)(er),我(wo)(wo)们(men)大可(ke)不(bu)(bu)必妄想(xiang);只看乃(nai)(nai)当不(bu)(bu)眠一个(ge)条件,你我(wo)(wo)能(neng)做(zuo)(zuo)到么(me)?唉(ai),你若主张或实行八小时(shi)睡眠,就别想(xiang)做(zuo)(zuo)至(zhi)(zhi)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren),真(zhen)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)了!但是(shi),也不(bu)(bu)用担心,还(hai)有(you)为(wei)我(wo)(wo)们(men)掮木梢的(de):我(wo)(wo)们(men)知道(dao)(dao),愚人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)也无梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)!他(ta)(ta)(ta)们(men)是(shi)一枕(zhen)黑甜(tian)(tian),哼呵到晓,一些(xie)儿(er)(er)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)的(de)影子(zi)也找不(bu)(bu)着的(de)!我(wo)(wo)们(men)徼幸还(hai)会做(zuo)(zuo)几(ji)个(ge)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng),虽因(yin)此失了至(zhi)(zhi)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren),真(zhen)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)的(de)资(zi)格,却也因(yin)此而得(de)免于(yu)愚人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren),未尝不(bu)(bu)是(shi)运气。至(zhi)(zhi)于(yu)至(zhi)(zhi)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren),真(zhen)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)之(zhi)无梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)和愚人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)之(zhi)无梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng),究竟有(you)何(he)分(fen)别?却是(shi)一个(ge)难题。我(wo)(wo)想(xiang)偷懒,还(hai)是(shi)摭拾上(shang)(shang)文说(shuo)过的(de)话来答吧(ba):真(zhen)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)......乃(nai)(nai)当不(bu)(bu)眠,......而愚人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)是(shi)一枕(zhen)黑甜(tian)(tian),哼呵到晓的(de)!再(zai)加(jia)一句(ju),此即孔(kong)子(zi)所(suo)谓(wei)(wei)上(shang)(shang)智与下愚不(bu)(bu)移也。说(shuo)到孔(kong)子(zi),孔(kong)子(zi)不(bu)(bu)反(fan)对做(zuo)(zuo)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng),难道(dao)(dao)也做(zuo)(zuo)不(bu)(bu)了至(zhi)(zhi)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren),真(zhen)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)?我(wo)(wo)说(shuo),唯(wei)唯(wei),否(fou)(fou)否(fou)(fou)!孔(kong)子(zi)是(shi)圣(sheng)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren),自(zi)有(you)他(ta)(ta)(ta)的(de)特殊的(de)地位(wei)(wei),用不(bu)(bu)着再(zai)来争至(zhi)(zhi)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren),真(zhen)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)的(de)名号(hao)了。但得(de)知道(dao)(dao),做(zuo)(zuo)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)而能(neng)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)(meng)周(zhou)公,才能(neng)成其所(suo)以为(wei)圣(sheng)人(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren)(ren);我(wo)(wo)们(men)也还(hai)是(shi)够不(bu)(bu)上(shang)(shang)格儿(er)(er)的(de)。

我(wo)(wo)(wo)(wo)们终于只(zhi)(zhi)能做(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)第二(er)流(liu)人(ren)物。但(dan)这(zhei)(zhei)中(zhong)间也还有(you)(you)个(ge)高(gao)低。高(gao)的(de)如我(wo)(wo)(wo)(wo)的(de)朋友P君:他(ta)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)见(jian)花,梦(meng)(meng)(meng)见(jian)诗,梦(meng)(meng)(meng)见(jian)绮丽的(de)衣裳(shang),......真可算得有(you)(you)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)皆甜了(le)。低的(de)如我(wo)(wo)(wo)(wo):我(wo)(wo)(wo)(wo)在江南时(shi),本忝在愚人(ren)之(zhi)(zhi)列(lie),照(zhao)(zhao)例是(shi)(shi)(shi)漆(qi)黑一(yi)(yi)(yi)团(tuan)地(di)(di)睡(shui)到(dao)天(tian)光(guang);不(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)过得声明,哼呵是(shi)(shi)(shi)没有(you)(you)的(de)。北来(lai)以后,不(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)知(zhi)怎样(yang),陡然(ran)聪(cong)明起来(lai),夜(ye)(ye)(ye)夜(ye)(ye)(ye)有(you)(you)梦(meng)(meng)(meng),而(er)且不(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)一(yi)(yi)(yi)其(qi)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)。但(dan)我(wo)(wo)(wo)(wo)究竟(jing)是(shi)(shi)(shi)新升格(ge)的(de),梦(meng)(meng)(meng)尽管做(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)(zuo),却(que)做(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)不(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)着(zhe)一(yi)(yi)(yi)个(ge)清(qing)(qing)清(qing)(qing)楚楚的(de)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)!成夜(ye)(ye)(ye)地(di)(di)乱梦(meng)(meng)(meng)颠(dian)倒,醒来(lai)不(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)知(zhi)所(suo)(suo)云,恍(huang)(huang)然(ran)若(ruo)(ruo)失。最难堪的(de)是(shi)(shi)(shi)每早(zao)将醒未醒之(zhi)(zhi)际,残梦(meng)(meng)(meng)依(yi)人(ren),腻腻不(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)去;忽然(ran)双眼一(yi)(yi)(yi)睁(zheng),如坠深谷(gu),万(wan)象寂(ji)然(ran)--只(zhi)(zhi)有(you)(you)一(yi)(yi)(yi)角日光(guang)在墙上痴痴地(di)(di)等(deng)着(zhe)!我(wo)(wo)(wo)(wo)此时(shi)决不(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)起来(lai),必凝神细(xi)想,欲(yu)追回(hui)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)中(zhong)滋(zi)味于万(wan)一(yi)(yi)(yi);但(dan)照(zhao)(zhao)例是(shi)(shi)(shi)想不(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)出,只(zhi)(zhi)惘(wang)惘(wang)然(ran)茫(mang)茫(mang)然(ran)似乎(hu)怀念着(zhe)些(xie)什(shen)么(me)而(er)已。虽然(ran)如此,有(you)(you)一(yi)(yi)(yi)点(dian)是(shi)(shi)(shi)知(zhi)道(dao)的(de):梦(meng)(meng)(meng)中(zhong)的(de)天(tian)地(di)(di)是(shi)(shi)(shi)自由的(de),任你(ni)徜徉,任你(ni)翱(ao)翔;一(yi)(yi)(yi)睁(zheng)眼却(que)就(jiu)(jiu)给密密的(de)麻(ma)绳(sheng)绑上了(le),就(jiu)(jiu)大大地(di)(di)不(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)同了(le)!我(wo)(wo)(wo)(wo)现在确乎(hu)有(you)(you)些(xie)精神恍(huang)(huang)惚(hu),这(zhei)(zhei)里(li)所(suo)(suo)写的(de)就(jiu)(jiu)够教你(ni)知(zhi)道(dao)。但(dan)我(wo)(wo)(wo)(wo)不(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)因(yin)此诅咒梦(meng)(meng)(meng);我(wo)(wo)(wo)(wo)只(zhi)(zhi)怪(guai)我(wo)(wo)(wo)(wo)做(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)的(de)艺术不(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)佳,做(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)不(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)着(zhe)清(qing)(qing)楚的(de)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)。若(ruo)(ruo)做(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)着(zhe)清(qing)(qing)楚的(de)梦(meng)(meng)(meng),若(ruo)(ruo)夜(ye)(ye)(ye)夜(ye)(ye)(ye)做(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)着(zhe)清(qing)(qing)楚的(de)梦(meng)(meng)(meng),我(wo)(wo)(wo)(wo)想精神恍(huang)(huang)惚(hu)也无妨的(de)。照(zhao)(zhao)现在这(zhei)(zhei)样(yang)一(yi)(yi)(yi)大串儿(er)(er)糊里(li)糊涂的(de)梦(meng)(meng)(meng),直是(shi)(shi)(shi)要将这(zhei)(zhei)个(ge)我(wo)(wo)(wo)(wo)化成漆(qi)黑一(yi)(yi)(yi)团(tuan),却(que)有(you)(you)些(xie)儿(er)(er)不(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)(bu)便(bian)。是(shi)(shi)(shi)的(de),我(wo)(wo)(wo)(wo)得学些(xie)本事,今夜(ye)(ye)(ye)做(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)(zuo)他(ta)几(ji)个(ge)好(hao)好(hao)的(de)梦(meng)(meng)(meng)。我(wo)(wo)(wo)(wo)是(shi)(shi)(shi)彻头彻尾(wei)赞(zan)美梦(meng)(meng)(meng)的(de),因(yin)为我(wo)(wo)(wo)(wo)是(shi)(shi)(shi)素人(ren),而(er)且将永(yong)远是(shi)(shi)(shi)素人(ren)。

(原载1925年10月《清华周刊》第24卷第8号)   

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